First Quest

Joraina sat at her desk, staring into the flame of the candle that burned nearby and holding her pen poised above her paper. She was filled with words, and yet she was unable to begin. When Sir Dagron had instructed her to write down the story of her path to become a KORT Page, he had described it as a quest. And now she understood why. There was no way to tell the story without re-living it in her memory. And anyone who has ever re-lived their memories in a story can attest to the manner in which threads of events that seem unrelated weave themselves together to form the whole of the tapestry. It is difficult to describe one event without first explaining another, just as an adventurer must often complete the necessary steps of a quest in a particular order, to insure that he will have the right tools and sufficient knowledge at the appropriate time.

As she sat with her pen in hand, writing nothing, Joraina failed to realize what all true story-tellers know. The decision of where to begin was not hers to make. The flood of memories that passed through her mind would create their own order. A story chooses its own path.

It was late in the afternoon and the sun was just beginning to set. The light in the stable at the southwest area of Darron Ranch in Longsaddle was growing dim. Joshua Darron, owner of the ranch, stood in the corner of the stable shaking his head sadly. His chief ranch hand and closest friend, Lars Adelbern, stood beside him. His expression was also somewhat grim. They watched as two of their strongest men struggled with the roan colt. The young stallion thrashed about wildly in the stall while the two ranch hands stood on either side, trying to force the bit of a bridle into his mouth.

"He'll not be broken anytime soon," Joshua stated flatly.

Lars only nodded. He was trying to keep an eye on his employer's young daughter who had entered the stable. Joraina loved horses and had a tendency to get too close when the hands were breaking a new one. Lars had long since stopped trying to keep her out of the stable. If truth be known, he enjoyed her company, so he accepted responsibility for her safety and never asked her to leave.

"I hoped he would be trained quickly. Old Darsey must be put down soon."

Lars nudged Joshua quickly, drawing his attention to Joraina standing in the doorway. She had obviously heard her father's words and stared at him with a stricken expression but said nothing for several moments. When she finally spoke, it was only to deliver a message and not to plead for the family's old horse as her father expected.

"Father, the men who were here yesterday to see you have returned. They are waiting at the house."

"What do they want now? I've already told them I have no work for them. Ross fired them for good reason. They are thieves. I have a bad feeling about those men, Lars. Did you send word to my brother about the threats they made to our neighbors?"

"Aye, Sir. Your brother will be here tonight and he is bringing a few of the other Knights to investigate these complaints."

"Gerald... Mark... go escort these thieves off our property. Lars and I will attend to the colt."

After the two ranch hands left the stable, Joraina moved closer to the stallion's stall. She was nearly stepping on her father's feet in her eagerness, while Joshua was reaching over the stall divider to hold the horse's head.

"Joraina! Go to the house and help your mother prepare quarters for your uncle and the Knights!"

Joraina was never intentionally disobedient. But she had a habit of becoming absorbed in her own thoughts and intentions while her father's instructions became lost in the breeze around her. Joshua was well aware of this, but his attention was so directed toward the colt that he didn't realize what his daughter was doing until it was too late to stop her. In a split second she had slipped between the side slats and stood inside the stall with the thrashing horse. With their hands full, fighting the colt, Joshua and Lars were unable to pull her out. Her father could only shout at her in worried frustration. She appeared not to hear him at all as she gently laid a hand on the young stallion's shoulder and stroked her way up his neck, under his mane. She moved closer so she could place both hands on him, one on each side of his head, stroking him and standing on tiptoe to scratch behind his ears. Joshua released the bridle to grab for his daughter. As soon as the bridle fell to the floor, the colt stopped struggling and stood calmly, content to have his ears scratched. Joraina smiled and kissed the white blaze on the horse's copper-colored face. Furious, Joshua could only look across the stall at Lars as if to say, "What can I do about her?" And Lars could only chuckle. Joraina stooped to pick up the bridle and rubbed the soft leather on the colt's nose, talking to him softly. When she started to slip the bridle back over his muzzle, her father grabbed her arm.

"Joraina, come out of the stall now. Even YOU can't convince a horse to enjoy the taste of a bit."

"He'll never get used to the taste of the bit, Father. But he will accept it when he understands that he is serving his master by wearing the bridle."

"I doubt that he is concerned with serving my needs."

Joraina smiled at her father as she slipped the strap of the bridle over the colt's ears.

"Father, how could anyone not be happy to serve you?"

Joshua looked at Lars to see if he was being mocked. And Lars confirmed it by bursting into stunned laughter.

"Surely I can not argue with her about that, Sir."

Joraina took advantage of their distraction to slip a piece of bread from her pocket and wrap it around the bit. When she pressed the bit into the colt's mouth, he took it without a struggle. By the time he had finished eating the bread from around the bit, the bridle was in place and securely fastened. Joraina patted the young stallion's shoulder and climbed out of the stall. Her father immediately pointed her toward the stable door. But Lars stood behind her and put his hand on her shoulder.

"Joshua, you know that when a hand breaks a difficult colt, you always offer the horse to him as his mount."

"You want me to give the colt to Joraina?!"

"Father, I don't want your stallion! Give me Darsey in trade for him!"

Joshua looked from his friend to his daughter and laughed.

"Joshua, you know how Jo likes to wander alone and how she often gets lost because she daydreams while she walks... Darsey may not be strong any more but he's still smart. He always brings your daughter home safely."

Joshua nodded and sighed with resignation. He would allow her to keep Darsey. Joraina stood on her toes to hug first her father, and then Lars, before she ran out of the stable calling for Darsey. Moving to the door of the stable, Joshua watched his daughter walk around the yard with the old horse following behind her, nibbling playfully at her long hair.

"Lars, explain to me why I can't seem to deny my daughter anything she asks of me."

"Sir, I thought you knew. It's a little girl's job to control her father's heart."

Joshua suddenly stepped out into the yard, staring into the setting sun. Lars moved out beside him and saw what had captured his attention. A thick cloud of black smoke was rising into the sky from the direction of the house. Joraina looked up just in time to see the two men run down the path that lead to the house. After several moments of hesitation, she tied Darsey's lead to a post and ran after them.

Joraina's first thoughts when she finally reached the house were ones of relief. Her uncle Jerrod and his friends had already arrived. She saw Abby, Jerrod's horse, standing at the gate with two others. Whatever had happened, Uncle Jerrod would know what to do. But her feelings of relief were quickly lost. She felt the blood drain from her face as the front door of the house opened and her mother was thrown out into the yard. One of the men Joshua had refused to hire came out after her, wielding a knife. In her shock, Joraina briefly saw that there was blood on her mother's arms... and she could see flames inside the house through the open door. From inside the house came the sounds of objects crashing against the walls... and the metallic clang of swords meeting. Her mother grabbed her and pulled her down on the ground. The evil stranger smiled as he came down off the porch, waving his long knife with a razor-sharp blade. Anna Darron screamed as her daughter was ripped from her arms and held tightly from behind by the stranger. The thief pressed the blade of the knife to Joraina's throat and laughed while she struggled. Joshua and Jerrod came out of the house, bloodied and coughing. They froze in their tracks when they saw Joraina in the arms of the thief. The man turned on them and spit at them.

"You have killed my brothers and now you will kill me. But I will take someone dear to you when I depart."

Joshua dropped his bloody sword on the ground and walked toward the thief slowly with his hands held out.

"Take anything you want... Take everything I own... We will let you leave unharmed if you only release the girl and leave my family safe."

"Do you think I'm stupid enough to believe that a Knight of the Round Table will stand by and watch while I escape with his brother's fortune?"

Jerrod stunned them all into silence by laughing out loud.

"Why wouldn't you believe it? You're a pathetic fool. In your last act before you die, you can think of no better revenge than to kill the daughter of a servant?"

The thief looked down at Joraina, puzzled. Understanding her uncle's plan, Joraina turned her attention to the front porch where Lars was clutching a rail and coughing.

"Father!"

The thief looked from Joraina to Lars and groaned. But when Jerrod tried to move toward him, he tightened his grip on Joraina and held out the knife.

"A Knight will not allow the killing of a child... no matter whose daughter."

"You are right about that. But if you truly want to punish the owner of this ranch before you die, you will take his brother, not the daughter of his servant."

Joraina's eyes grew wide and she started to shake her head, screaming. Jerrod laid down his sword and moved toward the thief, appearing completely unafraid.

"Release the girl and take the life of a Knight as your revenge."

The thief moved so quickly that he was a blur. He released Joraina and swung his arm across his body in one move, slashing the knife across Jerrod's throat. Joraina felt something warm hit her with great force and realized with horror that she was covered with Jerrod's blood. She fell to her knees, screaming... and allowing a clean shot from a fine long bow held by a Knight in the doorway who had been waiting for this opportunity. The thief fell and lay writhing in agony in the dirt.

As her mother's arms surrounded her, Joraina was finally able to stop screaming. She watched as her father knelt in the dust holding her uncle in his arms. She could not hear their words to each other but she saw Jerrod gesture toward her just before he died.

Nearly two years after Jerrod's death, Joshua was still consumed by sadness. Joraina was aware of the change in her father but was not entirely upset about it. Now he allowed her to spend as much time as she liked in the stables or working with the blacksmith. He turned a deaf ear to Anna's complaints that he was allowing his daughter to become a ranch hand instead of a young lady. But Joraina was sorry to see him so sad and she missed his scolding. It was his attention she had sought when she left her duties at the house to work in the stables and fields. But now that she had permission to work with the horses, it was the ranch hands who trained her. Her father was never available.

When Anna announced to her husband and daughter that she was finally expecting a second child, the veil of sadness was at last lifted from their home. Joshua was sure the baby would be a boy because he had prayed to Tyr for a son. The boy would be named Jerrod after his uncle and Joshua would raise him to be a Knight of the Round Table.

While helping her mother in the house one day, Joraina found a ring that her uncle had left to her father when he died. She brought it to her mother, appearing puzzled.

"Why doesn't Father wear the ring that Uncle Jerrod gave him?"

"Because he is saving it," her mother replied quietly.

"Saving it for whom?"

"For his son."

Anna watched as Joraina polished the ring, examining it closely and obviously admiring it.

"Did you read the inscription that circles the stone, Joraina?"

"Aye... but I'm not sure what it means."

Her mother took the ring and read the inscription aloud: 'The only glory of possession is the ability to give.'

"Joraina, it means that everything you own, every talent that you have is a gift from Tyr. And you can only show your gratitude by giving what you have to someone who needs it. Your uncle gave up everything he owned when he left to serve KORT. He trusted Tyr to provide for him. And he knew that his greatest possessions were his intelligence, his courage, and his own life. When it became necessary, he willingly gave his life in service to a greater good."

One day, thinking that Joraina would be at the stables attending her horses, Anna confronted her husband with her fears about the expected baby. Just as Joraina had a talent for missing important instructions, so she was often skilled at hearing things she was not meant to hear. She listened outside the kitchen door while her parents had this talk.

"Joshua, there is no guarantee that the baby will be a son. We must be grateful for a healthy child and not value a son over a daughter."

"Tyr will send me a son to raise as a Knight, Anna. I have seen it in my dreams. He allowed Jerrod to die before he could raise a son of his own, but he will provide a child that I can send to serve the Knights of the Round Table."

"You know that Jerrod always wanted to train Joraina. It was Joraina he looked upon when he gave you the ring. He was trying to tell you something, Joshua. Your greatest gift is your daughter and you neglect her while you wait for a son."

Outside the kitchen door, Joraina was deep in thought. Did her father really love her less for being a daughter instead of a son? There were brave and talented women in the service of KORT as well as men. She knew this from her uncle. Why had her uncle never told her that he thought she was suited for KORT? The thought that SHE could serve as a Knight had never occurred to her. She was so excited by the idea that she nearly stopped hearing her mother's words.

"Joshua, if you don't give the same attention to your daughter that you give to your son, Joraina will believe that a woman has less value in this world than a man. Or she will think that you blame her for Jerrod's death. If those are your true feelings, I pray that Tyr will help you to conceal them."

If it was true that her father loved her less than his anticipated son, Joraina never felt it or believed it. She looked forward to the birth of a brother with almost as much joy as Joshua. She felt no competition with this unborn child. Whatever her sibling's course might become, Joraina had made up her mind that SHE would someday serve KORT.

Lars was not pleased when Joraina began to take long trips alone. He knew that she was attempting to train herself for the life of a Knight; she had made no secret of her plans. But he still considered her a dreamer and he worried for her safety. She never discussed where she went or what transpired during her travels but she often returned looking beaten and discouraged. He heard stories that she was wandering areas of the realms where she had never travelled, even with a guide, and that she was making maps for her own use. He found this nearly impossible to believe knowing how frequently her short attention span had caused her to become lost on her father's own land. But one day as he watched her leaving the ranch on her horse, he realized that a change had occurred in her. She was more alert and attentive to her surroundings than he had ever seen her. And her expression suggested that she was focused more seriously upon her goal than he had ever known her to be before. If he had asked her this day where she was going, she would have told him... She was on her way to Camelot, to see for herself the place that had won the heart of her uncle.

Joraina spent several weeks in Camelot, wandering and observing. By the time she decided to return to the ranch, she had the strangest feeling that she was LEAVING her home instead of returning to it. She was amazed how quickly Camelot had filled her heart with a need to live for a higher power and serve a greater community. In Camelot she felt closer than ever to her God, and she paused outside the gate as she was leaving to give thanks to Tyr for showing her the path she was meant to follow. She spent her return trip planning how she would tell her parents that the time had come for her to leave the ranch. She would return to Camelot within the week to offer herself as a Page to the Knights of the Round Table.

When she arrived back at the ranch in Longsaddle in the middle of the night, she was surprised when Lars ran out to the stable to meet her.

"Jo, I'm afraid I have terrible news. Come quickly, your father needs you."

"What has happened? Is he ill?"

"No, child. It's your mother. Her labor began much too early."

Joraina waited for him to continue his explanation but he only gripped her arm, rushing her along the path to the house, staring straight ahead, refusing to meet her gaze. Finally she stopped on the path, refusing to walk any further.

"Lars! Tell me what has happened!"

He turned to her with tears filling his eyes and spoke softly.

"Your mother struggled as long as she could, Jo. She and the baby are with Tyr now."

Joraina could only stare at him, unable to speak. He put his hands on her shoulders and shook her slightly.

"Joraina, your father blames himself. If you harbor any resentment toward him, please let go of it now. He needs you. And he needs your forgiveness."

As the awareness of her mother's death settled over her, Joraina felt overwhelmed with sadness and pain. And she knew that she would need her father's comfort as much as he would need hers. She nodded and allowed Lars to lead her on to the house.

Joshua was sitting alone in the kitchen, staring at the window that looked out over the ranch in the direction of the stables. Joraina knew that he was imagining her mother there, washing the dishes and watching for her daughter to walk up the path from the stables. Her father's voice startled her when he spoke because she had thought he was not even aware of her presence in the room.

"Your mother was right, Jo. Tyr is punishing me. He took my wife and my son so that I would finally see what I already possessed and failed to appreciate. Will you ever forgive me?"

Joraina went to him and put her arms around him, sobbing on his shoulder.

"Father, there is nothing to forgive."

Her father held her until her crying had stopped. Then he placed a folded square of cloth in her hand. She pretended not to know what would be inside as she unwrapped it. And she only nodded with understanding as she held the ring tightly in her closed fist. For the moment, her plans with KORT would have to wait. Her father needed her. And a Knight must remain where she is most needed. She would allow her father the opportunity to provide her with the training he had longed to give his son.

Joraina stayed with her father for several years. She gave him the opportunity he felt he needed to atone for his behavior... all the while feeling that he had never truly wronged her, and wishing that he would forgive himself. When he became fatally ill, she stayed by his side day and night, holding his hand and praying with him. And when he voiced his last regret, that he would be leaving her without a family and without the charms a lady needed to acquire a husband and build a family, Joraina was happy to be able to reassure him.

"Someday the Knights of the Round Table will be my family."

After her father's death, Joraina left Darron Ranch in the care of Lars Adelbern and instructed him to think of it as his own.

"Lars, I don't know when or how often I will be able to return. You must promise me that you will truly think of the ranch as yours to do with as you see fit. You need not consult me on any matter... although you may send for me at any time if you need me. I am so much in your debt."

"Jo, I am happy to take care of the ranch for you and I will stay here until I die if you will allow me. But Darron Ranch will always belong to you and the family you will have someday. This is your home. How can you think that I would let you give it away?"

Joraina only smiled at him as she mounted her horse and set out for Camelot. My home, my possessions, everything I own that truly matters I carry with me, in my heart, she thought. And she slipped her uncle's ring onto her finger so she would never forget.

Joraina was startled awake by the sun streaming through the window of her room in Camelot, splashing light across her desk. Her candle had burned down to a glob of melted wax. A stack of pages lay before her, covered with words. Although the handwriting was her own and her fingers were smudged with ink, she could not remember writing any of it. She knew that Tyr had sent her the right words to comfort her father as he died... and now she believed that He had guided her hand in filling the blank pages with words, completing her first assigned quest.

Surely she was meant to be in this place.

Joraina Darron
Page of KORT